It’s Easier Not To

Someone said or did something that hurt your feelings. Should you say something? It’s easier not to. Your most trusted teammate wasn’t listening when you took the risk to expose your emotions. Do you let him know it made you feel like a low priority? It’s easier not to.

It’s a rare day when someone who matters to you doesn’t say or do something that rubs you the wrong way.  Like most of us, you let it go. Inevitably, the same sin or one of its relatives happens again a week or a month or a year later. No big deal, right?

Wrong. What you tolerate you sanction.

Healthy relationships call timeouts. When you catch things early, they never get the chance to send down roots. Early detection enables early intervention. Early intervention prevents pathology.

Embrace the pain of initiating crucial conversations. It is useful. Sacrifice the temporary comfort of avoidance for the long-term gain of moving your connections to a higher level of intimacy and trust. It’s easier not to but the consequences of avoiding the tough conversations are equivalent to begging for dysfunction.

It’s now or later. Healthy teams choose now.