Imagine you’ve been given a blank slate. You get to pick your teammates and choose your mission. You can choose how fast or slow to move and how cautious or risky to act. You have unlimited funds and a vast pool of talent. You get to start from zero. What’s your first move?

Eventually, everyone in your inner circle will say or do something that annoys you. Some will repeat these words and behaviors often enough to make you wonder why they’re still in your circle. Because a rich community requires diversity to survive, we don’t usually take the drastic route of cutting people out. In most cases, we’re left with the option to either tolerate or appreciate. When tensions are high, we tend to opt for tolerance. But, when we step back and look at the bigger picture, appreciation unfolds. Relationships, teams, neighborhoods, and communities are built on these responses. Let’s consider three examples and the lessons they teach.

The cycle of the seasons is a valuable reminder that living things require fresh fuel, reliable nurturance, space to grow, and an occasional reset. Just as the falling leaves provide spring fertilizer to plants awakening from a winter’s dormancy, teams harness the energy of change to recalibrate goals and direction. Fortunately, nothing stays the same. A shift in the business landscape or the addition/subtraction of a teammate alters the course. Some of these changes come unexpectedly. Most, however, are predictable. The key is knowing where you’re at in the cycle, why you’re there and, therefore, what comes next.

For the past few years, our consulting team has been employing music composition as a tool for personal, family, group, and organizational wellness support. It works for a simple reason. The trajectory of a song’s development parallels the path of a team’s growth. So, whether it’s a coaching client expressing their career challenge with song lyrics or a corporate leadership team broadcasting their mission with a marketing jingle, building teams is like composing music.

It’s time to get clear about what is sanctioned in the workplace. Psychology 101 teaches us that dysfunction is considered normal by children until they reach sufficient emotional maturity to realize it’s not. Do you mean all dads don’t abuse moms? No way? I thought treating people like $#!T was the way all families operate. Unless and until you have that epiphany, you are extremely likely to select a workplace culture that perpetuates your own personal pathology. Most workplaces are populated by employees who haven’t figured that out. That’s the prime reason healthy cultures are so rare.

The stereotype of a Tool & Die plant includes underpaid, burned-out workers and undesirable working conditions. Since the pandemic, many businesses in the manufacturing industry have been struggling to find and keep talent. It also doesn’t come as a surprise that supply chain issues and inflated material costs are cutting into operating margins. It’s easy to understand how these factors impact culture, let alone the complex series of interdependent work process that must happen in unison. Consider a typical day in the workplace.

The puppies in the image are playing, not fighting. The stakes are low. No ground rules, just play. If you are going to go toe-to-toe with a peer on an issue where the stakes are high, it’s best to have some rules. In professional settings, conflict management skills are trained and practiced regularly. Often deemed “conflict resolution,” there is an assumption that the outcome will include peaceful understanding and strengthened relationships. Not always. Not everyone fights fair. Here are 10 rules to consider the next time you decide to engage in a fight.

Not everyone is changing jobs during the mass resignation. Many people are simply considering transitions, and still others are using this window in their career trajectory to evaluate fit and direction. The decision is not binary. You don’t have to either stay or leave. You can do both. The freedom to leave equals the freedom to stay.

Everyone carries a burden. We live in a world where showing your pain is a sign of weakness, so most people’s burdens are not visible. Stanford University uses a duck as the metaphor for invisible effortlessness. The objective is to make accomplishment look easy so imagine the water fowl gliding swiftly across the water while his webbed feet are paddling like mad, out of view, to move forward. Most people respond with “fine” when asked how they’re doing. Are they really fine?

Succession planning has taken on new meaning over the past few years. Prior to the pandemic, it was simply the Baby Boom generation handing over leadership reins to the GenXers. The volatility of the COVID era has forced us to view these transitions through a different lens. Since the preciousness of life is now more fragile, succession is more of a gift to future generations.

The most common reason our phone rings is a problem with workplace culture. Every organization wants to have a positive, family-like vibe that attracts the best talent and retains them when the poachers come hunting. No brainer, right? Regardless of industry, the sustained achievement of this ideal is rare. There are so many ways things can go south. Even though there is a recipe, human frailty finds a way to mess with the ingredients. Unfortunately, the deeper the roots of the dysfunction, the deeper the fix.

We have many teachers over the course of a lifespan, both formal and informal. Some become secret role models even as they remain unaware of the impact they’ve had on our personal and professional trajectory. Others are selected and ordained with a formal responsibility to guide insight and discovery. Whatever the reason for the relationship’s formation, the ideal teacher-student relationship has distinct qualities. This connection embodies the smallest, and often most important, team.